Once there were two bears. Big Bear and LitÂtle Bear. Big Bear is the big bear, and LitÂtle Bear is the litÂtle bear. They played all day in the bright sunÂlight. When night came, and the sun went down, Big Bear took LitÂtle Bear home to the Bear Cave….
There was a time — and it doesn’t seem that long ago, I might add — that this genÂtle book was read in our own Bear Cave on a daiÂly basis. I know there are othÂer Big Bear and LitÂtle Bear books, but we nevÂer had them. We had just this one—Can’t You Sleep LitÂtle Bear? And we loved it — both the kids and the parents.
The kids delightÂed in the litÂtle jokes in the words and illusÂtraÂtions. Big Bear is the big bear and LitÂtle Bear is the litÂtle bear was hilarÂiÂous to #1 Son. DarÂling DaughÂter loved LitÂtle Bear’s acroÂbatÂics in bed when he was supÂposed to be setÂtling down to sleep. (She was perÂhaps all too inspired by them, in fact.)
And I loved it because….well, Can’t You Sleep LitÂtle Bear is one of those books that feaÂtures inspired parÂentÂing. As a parÂent who read a lot to the kids, I always appreÂciÂatÂed havÂing parental role modÂels in the books I read — wise and underÂstandÂing mothÂers, kind and empaÂthetÂic fathers. ParÂents who seem to be at their best in someÂtimes difÂfiÂcult or harÂried cirÂcumÂstances (like with the child who won’t go to sleep) — not perÂfect, selÂdom perÂfect, in fact — but rather, simÂply wise peoÂple who know how to take a deep breath, ask a perÂtiÂnent quesÂtion, and lead the child through to the resÂoÂluÂtion if there was one to be had.
Big Bear is an inspiÂraÂtional Dad. He may be exhaustÂed, but he has remarkÂable patience at the end of a day spent playÂing in bright sunÂlight. Sure, he grumÂbles a bit that he has to put down his Bear Book just when it’s getÂting to the interÂestÂing part — but he does put it down, and he genÂtly addressÂes the sitÂuÂaÂtion, with nary a hint of impaÂtience. Again and again he goes to his LitÂtle Bear who is turnÂing flip-flops on the bed and says “Can’t you sleep, LitÂtle Bear?” (He does not yell from the othÂer room: “FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY, WILL YOU GO TO SLEEP?!”)
And when LitÂtle Bear says he’s scared, Big Bear does not say “There’s nothÂing to be afraid of…” No, he asks what LitÂtle Bear is scared about. “I don’t like the dark,” [says] LitÂtle Bear. Big Bear asks a clarÂiÂfyÂing quesÂtion. “What dark?” And LitÂtle Bear tells him,“The dark all around us.” (We used to divvy up these lines when we read the book togethÂer. I’d say “What dark?” and they’d say, “The Dark All Around!” with very draÂmatÂic inflection.)
Big Bear looks, and he sees that the dark part of the cave is very dark, so he goes to the Lantern CupÂboard and brings a small light to LitÂtle Bear. He does this sevÂerÂal times, in fact. A largÂer light each time.
It’s the Lantern CupÂboard that gets me. Each time LitÂtle Bear protests the dark, Big Bear brings a largÂer light to vanÂquish the darkÂness that is all around. From the Lantern CupÂboard. I’d read that and think: shouldn’t we all have a Lantern CupÂboard? With difÂferÂent sized lights as might be needÂed for difÂferÂent and parÂticÂuÂlar sitÂuÂaÂtions? I’m sure I’d be a betÂter parÂent if I had access to a Lantern Cupboard.
In the end, the Big Bear and LitÂtle Bear leave the Bear Cave and go out where the darkÂness realÂly is all around. And LitÂtle Bear is scared, but Big Bear encourÂages him to look . “Look at the dark, LitÂtle Bear.” And litÂtle bear does. In the safeÂty of Big Bear’s arms, he looks at the darkÂness. And in the midst of the vast darkÂness, he sees the moon and the twinkly stars, too.
And this, I think, is what it is to parÂent — Lantern CupÂboard or no. We light the lights against the darkness…we go with them when and where we can…we offer our love with our strong arms wrapped around them so they can be brave and look out at all that is out there…and, hopeÂfulÂly, be surÂprised by the moon and the twinkly stars, too.
LoveÂly.
Thank you, David.